The “What Questions” vs The “Why Questions”

Jun
2011
26

posted by on Divorce Encouragement

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In our seasons of crisis and despair, we might ask the questions, “Why did this happen to me?” or “Why is God so mean to me?” Matthew 5:45 says “For He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust”. So the fact is that life on this earth is just not fair, but we must remind ourselves that God is still loving, gracious and good, He still has justice in His nature and He is still totally sovereign. We must also remember that we live in a fallen world, so bad things will happen to good people. We also know that good and bad things happen to bad folks as well. So we want to discuss the benefits of asking the “what” questions, rather than the “why” questions, like “God, what do you want to do in my life through this trial of crisis, chaos or confusion”, rather than ” God, why are you treating me so bad?…

From Scripture, we find these three observations about life…
1. Trials are inevitable.
Bad times are not a possibility, they are a promise. 1 Peter 4:12 says, “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.”

2. Trials tend to “make us” or “break us”.
”Trials tend to be a two-edged sword. Did you know that the Chinese characters for the word “crisis” are actually two pictures: one represents the word “tragedy” and the other represents the word “opportunity.” Your crisis can be a tragedy or an opportunity, depending upon how you respond to it. James 1:2-4 says, “My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.”

3. Victims often fail to move beyond asking the “Why questions” and they often remain indefinitely stuck in the pain and anguish of their emotional circumstance.
A person who continually feels victimized by the circumstances of life usually never gets beyond the “Why questions”. They often ask, “Why did this have to happen to me?” “God, why are you so unfair?” But those who learn to conquer their season of crisis, usually stop asking “Why,” and start asking, “What?”

Once we get through the emotional pain that causes us to ask the “Why questions”, we must move to ask the “What questions”. We must move to ask, “God, what would you like to say to me through my broken world experience that would help me to fulfill Your purposes in my life? We must move to ask, “Lord, what do You want me to learn through this?” “God, what can You do that will build within me, the skills, experience and availability to serve others through this experience?” “Lord, what do You want to do through me, both in the midst of this crisis, and after this crisis has passed through my life?”

This pivotal action of deciding to ask the “What questions” instead of the “Why questions” has the power to help you move through your broken world experience. In other words, it’s totally okay for you to camp out for a season, in asking the “Why questions”. But I want you to know that staying there beyond its useful purpose will be lethal…

Despite the difficult circumstances you might find yourself in, I want you to know that God absolutely uses future-altering crisis as an opportunity to redirect your life in a positive direction; God totally uses life-changing chaos as a time to refocus your attention on Him; and God thoroughly uses mind-bending confusion as a tool to clarify your purpose and calling on this earth. I know that God did this for me as I went through my separation and divorce; And God continues even now, to direct and redirect my life through ongoing seasons of confusion and crisis…

I want to encourage you in your season of crisis, to move beyond the “Why questions” and into the “What questions” in your communication with the Lord and with others, I know you will do so much better if you can do that…

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