Divorce Can Make You Sick

May
2010
02

posted by on Divorce Encouragement

1 comment

Recently, Chuck Colson commented on his Breakpoint Radio Series that “Divorce Can Make You Sick”. He was quoting from Time magazine and the New York Times on a study done by some doctors that the stress of going through a divorce can affect your health, sometimes for the long term. Since our ministry is most often utilized by those who’ve had the divorce decision put upon them by a spouse who was either unwilling to stay in the marriage, or unwilling to stop their marriage-ending behavior, we find this study to be no big surprise!
I know that Mr. Colson’s heart was in the right place. I know that his intent was not to further discourage broken people, his goal was probably to discourage folks from getting a divorce or to encourage married folks to use these findings to share Biblical truth with unbelievers. But I think it’s optimistic to believe this study will have much effect upon a rising divorce statistic, because those of us who’ve experienced a marriage failure know that most self-driven spouses who are determined to end, or bring about the end of a marriage probably won’t be deterred by an obscure health benefit they might enjoy by either acting correctly or by staying in their marriage.

I appreciate when those who have never been divorced take the initiative to help, or to comment on the effects of this process. I have even heard sincerely helpful people say, “Oh, you’re going through a divorce; I know just how you feel, I lost my dog once”. Those of us who are in the midst of this devilish process; and those of us who are “Working Through The Crisis” of figuring out how to live this life as true Christian single adults can’t really expect true understanding from those who’ve never been there and simply don’t understand, and we ought not to try…

In living out this process and figuring out how, as Christians, to live this new life, we really face two big challenges…
1… How to stay soft-hearted and forgiving without being vulnerable to various advantage-seekers and disingenuous people…
2… How to stay determined to live a day to day life of purity and wholesomeness regardless of the general unfairness of our current situation…

If we are going to do that:
… We must learn to be our own best friends…
… We must be diligent to guard our hearts; our ears; and our minds.
… We must bring ourselves to the Word and to the grace of God on a daily basis to wash off the crud that has stuck to us from the previous day…

That is a very tall order indeed, but that’s the order God gave everyone before He left this planet to prepare a place in heaven for us. So if this event has forced us to be more diligent than others seem to be, in doing those things God told everyone to do in the first place, then I guess we just have to decide to be okay with it after all. Since it’s the stress that causes the health problems, we should make it a goal to give the problems and the stress over to a loving God every day, that way our divorce doesn’t have to make us sick. That’s my opinion, I’d really like to know yours… Share it here and in our Facebook group…

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